Friday, January 3, 2014

The Truth About Dating After 65


Online Dating for Seniors

The Truth About Dating After 65
If you’re interested in meeting someone you’re going to have to date. Before you jump into online dating there’s a few things you want to consider.
This Is What It Looks Like Getting to Where You’re Going
Divorced, single, or widowed now is the time to take stock of your past relationships and most importantly know yourself. Before you start dating take time and ask:
  • How satisfied are you with yourself?
  • How satisfied are you with your relationships?
  • How satisfied are you with your work life?
  • How satisfied are you with your social life?
Remember whether you join a club in hopes of meeting someone or try online dating they both have one thing in common, YOU! It’s time to start  the journey of self discovery. 2014 is the year to begin mindful dating that begins with you.

Really, before you begin online dating it’s time to take an honest personal inventory. Curious? Follow me on Twitter @ComeBackCupid for daily questions.
My name is Judi Bonilla I'm an Aging Expert and President of Come Back Cupid a company that encourage online dating for adults age 65 and over.








Thursday, August 1, 2013

Come Back Cupid! Tips For Seniors - How to Choose an Online Dating Name


Come Back Cupid! Ideas On Choosing Your Dating Name

Online dating for seniors can often come with many opportunities to stretch your comfort zone. No one told you that it might also stretch your creativity too.
Senior Dating.
Choose wisely when creating an online dating name.
For many older adults venturing into online dating creating an online dating name has them flummoxed. Are you having trouble creating creating an online dating name? Join the club I too agonized over what name to use. Then struck my inspirationWell actually it's when I almost hit the car in front me I had an epiphany! What about taking inspiration from a personalized license plate?
The world opened up to me. Personalized license plates are often based on a nickname, hobby or interest. Voila! I love to dance!! Jitterbug, Hula, and Salsa
are my favorites. What makes me unique? Hula not many dancers and then the list making was on. HulaHips….No too sexual.  IHula… Better but that wasn't it.
Then, I remembered a license plate I once saw Happy1. How about HulaHappy? Fun and just a little flirty... just like me.

My advice for creating your online dating name.


  1. Make a list of your interests, hobbies, and aspirations.
  2. Make a list of how you describe yourself.
  3. Then begin combine the two until you find that wining combination.
Now remember you may be one hot, XXX, sexy, fiery femme fatale. Ask yourself how often do you introduce yourself that way. You don't. Think of your online dating name as a calling card, a hello to someone you've never met.
Select a name that says hello, want to know more about me?


Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Dating After 60 - Yes You!

Dr. Pepper Schwartz
Sex and Relationship Expert

Who's dating in their 60's plus? You are. American's in their 60's and above are the fastest growing demographic of online daters.

Today, I was fortunate to hear Dr. Pepper Schwartz on Love Knows No Age At A share tips and give advice on dating. If you've attended a Come Back Cupid! class. You'll be glad to know you're more than prepared to date successfully.

Come Back Cupid! is based on six principles.


  1. Have Fun
  2. Keep Safety in Mind
  3. Prepare yourself Mentally
  4. Prepare yourself Physically 
  5. Set up Your Online Profile
  6. Go Out and Date


In her presentation,  Dr. Schwartz's first tip was to keep a positive attitude about yourself and the dating process. In my class, I compare this to the following example. You're in a hurry. You say I'm going to be late. Not once. You repeat this over and over. How did you feel when you arrived. Harried or relaxed? Prepared or flustered?

It's the same with dating. My friends tease me when I say. "I get to date." It's the truth. I'm taking action to get me where I want to go…to my someone special.

Friday, July 12, 2013

Online Dating Boot Camp - Creating a "Dating" Email Address

Dating Tips for Senior Citizens
Would You Want To Date a Ninja?
Congratulations, you've made the decision to begin dating online.

First step create a "Dating" email address dedicated to corresponding with potential suitors. Why?

Safety - Your current email cannot be tracked back to you under a Google search. You may have shared your email address with a company or organization which in turn may have published it online. A secondary email address enables you to control your privacy.

Simplicity - A secondary email address will enable you to easily keep track of messages from dating websites and correspondence from your "matches." You'll never miss an important or message from a dating website or suitor.

How to Set up a Secondary Email Address
Tip: Read through the steps and view the video before setting up your new email address.

I suggest using Yahoo Mail to create your secondary address. Click this link Yahoo Mail to sign up.  Here's a link for a YouTube video on creating a new email address. Please note there is no sound.

Once you're there click on the Create New Account button.

The Yahoo Registration form will step you through the process and will ask for your name. 

  1. My Name Is - I suggest using your first name and the first letter of your last last name.
  2. Yahoo ID - This is the first part of your dating profile. Select something simple and easy to remember. Perhaps SDSally, BeachBetty, or JoanieB.
  3. Pick a Password - Yahoo asks that you create an 8 character password. You cannot use your name or user ID.
  4. Personal Information - Complete this information.
  5. If You Can't Sign In - This information may come in handy if you forget your Yahoo ID or Password.
  6. Create Account - Press the Create Account button for your new email address.
  7. Secret Questions - These are security measures to keep hackers out of your email. 
  8. Mobile Number - This is used for verification only.
  9. Security Code - This is used to make sure you're a human entering the information and not a computer program.
  10. Done - Press this button to create your account.
  11. Confirmation - Yahoo Mail provides you with a confirmation of account details. You confirmation can be printed and kept for your records.
  12. Get Started - You're now connected to your new email account.






Sunday, May 19, 2013

More Than A Tech Fair by R.J. Ignelzi



 — A bold new world is about to open up for Joanne Peterson.
Get Connected! participant
Courtesy UTSan Diego

The 72-year-old Chula Vista resident will soon be able to see her grandchildren in Ohio on a daily basis. She’ll be able to comparison shop without leaving her home. And, she will reconnect with old friends all over the country. All these life improvements are thanks to what she learned at Saturday’s Technology Fair for the over-50 set.
“It’s time I caught up with everyone else and learned how to do more than just email on my computer,” said Peterson, who attended the gathering of about 500 people at Macy’s Westfield Mission Valley. “I don’t expect to ever become a technical genius, but I don’t want to be left too far behind.”
The tech fair was designed to help local adults age 50 and older learn how to use social media and today’s gadgetry, including smartphones, tablets and the latest software. Technology experts from San Diego OASIS presented 30-minute sessions on a variety of tech topics, as well as one-on-one coaching to the tech novices.
San Diego OASIS, based on the third-level of the Macy’s store, is a nonprofit organization serving people 50-plus throughout San Diego County. The group’s mission is to promote successful aging and offer classes on everything from health and business to the arts and personal growth.
A 10-year OASIS member, Rita Blanchard, came to the tech fair to learn how to navigate her new iPhone.
“Lordy, Lordy, has it ever been a challenge. I had a simple phone before and it was intuitive. But with this phone you have to know the esoteric language,” said the 75-year-old retired nurse from Carmel Valley, who was also interested in learning about different apps and how to upload a video.
Learning new computer skills may do more than just help seniors become tech literate. It may also make their brains work more efficiently.
A recent study at the University of Arizona showed that after learning to use Facebook, adults ages 65-plus experienced a boost in cognitive function. They performed about 25 percent better on tasks designed to measure their ability to continuously monitor and quickly add or delete the contents of their working memory — a brain function known as “updating.”
“By educating our members about social media and how to fully utilize the growing trend toward online, we are confident that it will help improve their cognitive abilities and make them feel more connected to friends and family,” said San Diego OASIS executive director Simona Valanciute.
Some of the more popular seminars at the fair included lessons on electronic gadgets and gizmos, Gmail, Windows 8, Facebook and Skype.
But the session that piqued the most interest was Online Dating for 50-plus.
“The class was driven strictly by student request. A lot of students are in their mid-70s and are interested in how to date online,” said Judi Bonilla, the OASIS tech instructor who taught the dating class. “We are living longer and we are aging healthy. Part of that is having a relationship.”
It’s not exactly love that Barbara Tucker is looking for as much as a male companion and occasional dinner date.
“It would just be nice to have a man my own age to share some things with. But it’s so hard to meet anyone,” said the 72-year-old San Diego resident, who admitted she was “a little nervous” about meeting someone online. “I never thought I’d be looking for a date online, and I’m not even sure how to get started. That’s why I’m here.”
Aside from guiding the class through the maze of dating websites and teaching them how to create an intriguing profile, the focus was on online dating safety.
“We are all vulnerable. If you’re not tech savvy, there are people who can take advantage of you,” Bonilla said. “My goal is to make my students feel empowered with the skills and facts and have the confidence to pursue (online dating). If you want love you should have love.”
For more information about San Diego OASIS, visitoasisnet.org/sandiego.




Thursday, May 16, 2013

Get Connected! Tech Fair Dating Online for 50+

It's almost here! This Saturday I'll be speaking at Get Connected! The Tech Fair for adults 50+ hosted by Oasis Institute. My presentation will cover personal safety, dating site review, dating readiness, and creating a profile. I promise an honest, interesting presentation, and answers to many of your questions. If you're ready to date, join me this Saturday to find out where to start.